Tennis and Small Dogs!

I have to say that the above-mentioned sport (tennis, not small dogs; though I don't see where the hell you'd get the idea that small dogs is a sport) is one of the things that bugs me most. It's strange, because I have pretty good hand-eye coordination while drawing, or painting; but when it comes to tennis I just can't seem to connect ball with racquet!!! I can laugh it off for the first fifteen minutes or so, but when I start whacking myself in the face (and I mean literally) with the racquet, I begin to get furious at myself and need to quit. I've tried practicing, it just doesn't seem to work. poopy.
My mom's really good at tennis and all tennis-like sports (i.e., ping pong), and she's always trying to give me advice about playing. I know she means well, but her most common piece of advice is: "Keep your eye on the ball." Well, for Godsake, I DO! I watch the ball, but when I try to hit it, my depth perception just goes away and I end up swinging the racquet at something entirely different; like my sister, or a small dog. (Another wierd fact about me: whenever I'm really, really sleepy, I laugh at any reference to small dogs.) I just hope that my mom will give up trying to teach me tennis before I severly injure her (by accident of course).
So today was all right. The morning was great; I went to the zoo and saw tree kangaroos and other long-leggedy-beasties. I got to go in an exhibit where (for a mere $1) they give you a stick of birdseed and put you in a room full of birds. These are not just any birds; these are birds who can't ever get enough food. I suppose that could be the reason that one of them pooped on me. I had never been pooped on before by an animal (not like I've ever been pooped on by a human), and it is reducing my burning desire to live in Venice. Though the exhibit itself is a fun experience, when you think about it, what they're really doing is having YOU pay THEM to feed THEIR animals. :)

On a different topic, I'm dead meat right now because I haven't picked out an audition piece for my next audition thing. And I REALLY want to get into this show; it's The Crucible. I saw my acting-coach-like-person as John Proctor in a recent production of The Crucible, and he was so good. EVERYBODY was soooo good. Even though the play is really intense and sort of depressing, I love it all the same. In fact, if you're reading this, why the hell aren't you reading The Crucible? Jolly good literature.

TFATF (which, for all you new readers, is short for "thanks for all the fishsticks"; if you don't get it, read the book of a similar title)!!!!
-Ahaneen

Morning Glories

Anyway,
they said,
there was a way out,
and that way was God.
That was what my mother said
when I climbed in beside her on the bed.
I asked, "do you believe in God?"
and she said, "Yes,"
Yes like clinging to a pebble in a storm
and thinking you are safe.
it hurt me to hear those words
because I think
it's against my principles
to have principles themselves,
and because there was no way out
of my ravine
but there was God.
An image,
a portrait of desire--
I thought to myself,
It would be grand to believe in God,
but it would be like believing in the rich people
because it all comes back to you.
my mother said,
"Well, that happens;
Everyone has something that just bugs them."
and that
was like finding a terrible wound on your leg
then learning there's a spider in your bed.
but the wound was still the same,
and it still bled.
blood like the color of the numbers--
12:58, 1:07.
why couldn't it be morning?
because though books and words and music
will fail you
and though after many years a mother's arms
become like old sleeves, warm,
but worn,
nothing whisks away the curling digit of fear
better than the morning.
sorrow will shrivel up and flee,
from the lion inside me,
the sword of reason growing, sadness done,
in the morning, in the sun.

p.s. I'd still like helpful comments on the previous post (thanks, dippy-hippy, for putting hopefully the first of many up)

Public or Private? (Just Not Catholic)

Opening note: I'd be very glad for comments on this post, especially the sort which shall be mentioned later here. So sit back... shut up!... and read. ;)

I'm going to type at you about one of my biggest dilemmas right now: high school applications. Well, I don't need to tell you that I'm a smart cookie; you've probably guessed that from the high level of intelligence which shines through in earlier posts. (Aw, shut up and just believe it; I AM smart.) So whatever high school I go to, I want it to be one where I don't twiddle my thumbs the whole four years that I'm there. I want it to be one where I can really get prepared for the kind of life I want to lead, namely an educated one in which I can follow through with my many ambitions. Right now, I'm attending private school; academically it's great. So why, you ask, don't I just say "I'm a-going to private high school, where I'm almost positive it'll be academically challenging because they make you pay so much"?
The answer is: these high schools charge 25k/year to attend. And even though my parents make a good deal of money, it really isn't enough to add 7k to the yearly school tuition that we pay for my sis and I to go to private school. Of course, we have applied for financial aid from all of the private high schools that I'm applying to, but financial aid usually goes to families who don't have as much money as we do. The truth is that we DO have a good deal of money--it just ain't quite enough. In other words, my family fits into the tiny crack where it's extremely unlikely for me to get the financial aid to attend a private, 25k/annum high school.
Which sucks.
Now on the other hand, even if my parents had the ample money to send me to a private high school, I would probably still consider going to a public high school. There are lots of benefits, such as more extracurriculars, a bigger student body, and more of the things that are considered parts of the "high school experience". In a tight and rather cushy private school, some of those things just aren't available. And after four years in a private high school, with the same 60 kids in my grade, I'm probably going to know everybody's dogs' names. It would be really nice to be in a larger community of people for high school--not to mention a more diverse one. And just as a side benefit, if I went to public school, my parents would have more money each year to spend on things that are not school tuition--such as taking trips out of the country. Due to financial restrictions, I have only been out of the country once in my life... to Vancouver Island, Canada, which is just across the Washington border. Canada's not really South Africa or Italy if you know what I mean. Eh?

I didn't apply to any Catholic schools, partly because I'm not Catholic and wouldn't enjoy the religion classes any more than I enjoy my dad's reading of Bible stories to me every Sunday. And partly because half of the Catholic high schools are all girls, which I DON'T THINK I COULD STAND. Fellas are needed.
So there you have my dilemma: public or private (just not catholic)? On one hand, there is the academics of a private school that I just won't get at the public schools I've seen so far; on the other hand there is the environment of a public school which would really be a nice change and which I could never get in a small private school. On top of it all, there is my dad who wants me to go to private school and my mom who would rather I go to public.
So returning to the beginning of this post: would people please comment about their opinions on this matter? Because it's becoming way too hard to talk to anybody I know about high school, and new opinions would be most gladly welcome.
TFATF!!!!
-Ahaneen :)